|Hash Latest Archive 12/2/03 to 28/10/03|
28/10/03 Dear Rotter: Some hash business:
|25/10/03 Dear GM, Following Keeleds outing of my programme I feel obliged to offer some explanation. In a nutshell, it would appear that HMGN has finally rumbled the number of expats on the programme, the fee rates we charge and the amount of beer that I drink. Hence the official renaming. Towed|
|24/10/03 Rotter, I must urgently protest against Keeled's keeled-over view of Middle Marsyangdi Hydroelectric Project being affiliated with the HHHH. I have always kept work separated from leisure and successfully convinced my colleagues NOT to turn up at the Hash (unlike "Spare Parts"). I am ready to receive any kind of award for this outstanding commitment towards the real idea of Hashing. Needless to say that my dear friend Gabi is an exception. Cheers, 69 ON-ON|
|23/10/03 Rotter, The Kathmandu Post on Wednesday 22 October 2003 carried an important report that the government is cementing its ties with three major Hash affiliated projects. The good news is that 69's Middle Marshyangdi Hydropower Project, Night Owl's Melamchi Drinking Water Project, and Towed's RAP are all going to benefit from HMGN's failure to take concrete decisions. The surprising development was the renaming of RAP as the Rural Excess Project. We await notification of RAP's new objectives and look forward to Towed being more excessive than usual of a Saturday afternoon! Keeled|
|19/10/03 Hash 1300 - after the GM was overwhelmed by the lack of ideas 69 and Grumble came forward to suggest a run from Bishankuharayan temple, east of the Godavari road. If this comes about we will organize some festive snacks to celebrate Laxmi Puja and 69's last run.|
. . . I Hashed on Kathmandu about 4 years ago and now I'm in Bhopal, where
I founded the Hash a year ago (all but 3 days) with GM
Jairam Bhatia, whom you exchanged emails with recently. Please say
'Hi' to the H4-ers who may remember me. Some may still be wearing their
'Hash Pash' T-shirts which I brought from Orissa.
On-on... Hardon (aka John Standingford), Bhopal, 09/10/03
look at the hash web shite occasionally and it is good to see from Trash
1294 that the hash has, at last, spent some of the surplus funds Rotter
talked about for long enough! Hope you all enjoyed the party especially
the bit to which Bog Trotter and I
contributed. (Thanks for your most welcome and much
remarked upon contribution to the success of the event. Please stay away
next time as well - GM)
Has Rotter entered his geriatric phase or can the architectural profession not afford haircuts? From the description of him on the run maybe he will regain his strength, like Samson ,when he cuts his hair. (I'm just trying to compensate for all the shiny-top engineers, diplomats, and editors on the hash - GM)
Regards to all, Turd Herder (House husband in Ireland)
3/10/03 Regarding Trash 1293 At last it has been posted but sadly the GMs grasp of who would be responsible for the run is, as ever, inadequate. Originally billed as hared by Towed and Hernia, the trash names the hares as Towed and Tadpole. To any fool looking at the trash (and lets face it, only fools do) it is clear that the hares were Towed and Head Chopper.
Head Chopper is upset, or at least he will be when I tell him to, and demands and immediate apology to be publicly issued. And no, we do not believe that the trash was sexed up, but will ask Nicolet to set up the Hutter Enquiry.
Head Chopper, I grovel before thee. Perhaps I should start reading the trashes, although I doubt that my attention span is sufficient to get more than a quarter of the way through a typical Towed diatribe - GM
hashers! There will be a buffet
barbecue party at the Godavari
Resort after next week's Hash 1294.
People who have already signed up:
17/9/03 Photo found for Hash 1292 but not, unfortunately, of the event itself. Still, another chance for Grumble, 69, and friend to look stupid. GM
|19/9/03 Grumble and 69's "friend" looks remarkably like Guano to me. Good to see thay're all law abiding - no visors down, no balaclava's and no pillion passengers. Towed|
21/8/03 - Towed,
I have just given your driver guru another lot of paper in a Hash-owned
poultry supplement bag. Whereza one you received last week? And how many
others have you taken and not returned over the last year? Not, by any
chance using them to raise chickens?
You're not even laying paper next week. Rotter
|later that same day . . .
. Dear Dumbledore (aka Wonder
Man on the Riot scale),
Indeed I confess to having purloined paper under false pretences in hash owned bags. You are right, it is not for me but was obtained at the request of Beaufort, whose driver does not possess the wit to find your office. Beaufort needs it to supply the profligate Peck, both of whom are laying paper on Saturday (a fact that has finally been acknowledged on the webshite). As regards the one I received last week, I did not. I did, however, return the one from two weeks previous on Saturday when you finally dragged your drug ridden body to a Hash. You immediately consigned it to the custody of Mrs Rotter by the siple expedient of shouting Oi! and waving the said bag at her.
If you are referring to the bag I got on Monday, it was also for Peck. Love from Towed
|21/8/03 - My Hash Name: - Griot (an African teller of tales, legends and lore) Don Clark|
|21/8/03 - This
Name cannot be allowed:
a) no-one on the HHHH can either pronounce it or understand what it means.
b) applied to you its meaning must certainly be ironic. It's like calling the GM 'Wonder Man'.
c) How about taking the G at the front off?
|22/8/03 - As griot has been deemed to be an unacceptable epithet for Don; (hmm . . . should be a comma there I think - GM) could I suggest the not unrelated hash name of 'Oral idiot'? which at least retains some connection with both the meaning and the sound of griot. Griot means 'A storyteller in W Africa; one who perpetuates the oral traditions of a family or village.' Keeled Over|
|22/8/03 - So we could call Don's bluff by making him tell tales from HHHH folklore every week. GM|
|18/8/03 - Where's this week's trash? On my hard disc awaiting illustration. GM|
|16/8/03 - Where's the trash? Coming soon. I have had rotten computer problems this week, both viral and hardware. All sorted now. Gimme a break. GM|
- The Keeleds UK Holiday Our correspondent reports that Keeled Over
and family have just about made it back from an eventful holiday in the
UK. The first incident happened at Tribhuvan airport where wary immigration
officials refused Carrotbrain and Christopher leave to board the plane.
However, the Keeleds made it on to the plane -- admittedly not going to
there preferred destination -- the next day after a hectic day hashing around
Kathmandu. Similarly, a week later Keeled Over ran in the Bald Mountain
Challenge Fell Race in mid-Wales. The nine mile race up to the 1900 ft rounded
hilltop was not just open to bald people but was named after the hill --
called Moelfre in Welsh -- that the competitors had to slog up and down.
Keeled proudly bore the HHHH colours round the course coming in a credible
15th although he was just pipped for the trophy awarded to the first bald
finisher. His brother finished 5th and his brother-in-law 27th out of 28
competitors. The final highlight of their holiday came at Manchester airport
on the way home where Keeled Over fell foul of airport security. He was
briefly impounded for trying to carry a meat cleaver and breadknife on to
the plane in his hand luggage. He was however released soon after as the
security officials believed his story that he had just got a bit mixed up
when doing his packing.
I bet that the Toweds didn't have such an eventful holiday. (Nor
did the Rotters; we just don't suffer from this streak of incompetence
that causes the Keelings to fumble around the world's airways, closing
airports and upsetting all the passengers - GM)
12/8/03 Retort from Keeled re. Hash mismanagement:
Is the Grandmaster in any position to accuse others of incompetence!? (How dare you Keeled. I'll have a word with you at next week's Hash, if I can find the On-In site - GM)
- Trash 1284 Just realised that I had
not read this literary masterpiece and having now done so would make one
comment. In the photograph captioned male returnees I'm not too sure about
the one on the right - could be a gender bender and we all know thet're
not allowed on the hash. It ain't the Anglican church of the US. Mind you,
if it is a male, I might wish to review my sexual orientation in the near
future! Towed (It's
probably the only way for Run Crafty to be allowed by Barbara to employ
it in his office - GM)
PS. You didn't post the article on wankers I sent a while ago. On reflection I wonder where, in Australia, they found the control group. Sorry, Towed, I thought it was too long for the average Hasher's attention span - GM
|28/6/03 Sorry, I have been away for the last week, and also had problems with my computer, so I have not been able to update the site until now. Trashes 1279 and 1280 posted and everything else sorted out I hope - GM|
|17/6/03 On the occasion of her last run with the HHHH (for the moment, anyway - GM) Jedi has produced commemorative T-shirts which she's been selling for 400 rupees per one. According to the J: "It's a lovely design of us running up to Swayambu and me running home. If you haven't yet bought or ordered one I have 2 extra of every size (38, 42, 46, 50) which I'll bring to Hash 1280. Please email me if you want one and can't be there Saturday, or if you just want to stake your claim on one before they all go."|
|10/6/03 Oi, I have to complain about the treatment of this weeks trash, firstly the bastardisation of the final paragraph which, in its original form was modestly complimentary about the run, not the catering, and secondly about the break with tradition of excluding the piccie of the hashit awardee and replacing it with one of a bloke and a wussie long hair standing on a piece of grass. Yours in high dudgeon Towed|
| 7/6/03 Towed
saw this story on BBC News Online and thought you should see it.
The party of Sri Lanka's President Chandrika Kumaratunga brands peace broker Norway a "nation of salmon-eaters" who have become international busybodies".
|31/05/2003 Dear Rotter Yes I agree that bearing in mind the present fading state of the Hash, sponsoring electrician Rokaya the Rocket in the Everest marathon would not be a bad idea even if it would be dangerous for the future of the Hash. How about giving him one of the leftover Run 1200 T shirts? Keeled|
|17/05/2003 Ace mountain marathoner and occasional Hasher Hari 'Rock-with-you' Rokaya spotted in Jumla by the GM earlier this week. He's now in training for the Everest Marathon later this year. I think he has won it once or twice. Last year he was sponsored by Necon Airways. Bearing in mind the present fading state of this company, would it be too dangerous for the future of the Hash to help him out this year? GM|
|15/4/03 Does anyone have the main photo from Trash 1238? The one on the webshite and my local copy are corrupted as the top half seems to be in focus and shows people enjoying themselves. GM|
|15/5/03 Courtney, Jedi and I will be having a farewell party (What! are you ALL leaving? What about the mutt, etc? - GM) after this weekend's run (Hash 1275 - GM) from 7pm at 1905 (on Kantipath, next to Standard Chartered Bank). I will need to know the approximate number of people attending for Kilroy to make snacks. If you would like to come please email me or let me know at the run. Hope to see you there. Hayden|
|10/5/03 Dear GM, Due to
the outstanding success the black forest team will hare the Brezel Run II
on 17.of Mai. We are sure that we will set a new participation record again.
Since the run will take place within the area of the new Orienteering Running
Map potential orienteering runners have to run with closed eyes in order
not to get advantages. ON ON Bendy Toes
PS. Even though President Bush had problems eating a brezel we should make clear that brezels are not weapons of mass destructions.
|20/4/03 18.25hrs: ex-GM Herman
"FITD" Grimminck passed away.
The HHHH family expresses great sadness at the loss of one of its most loved,
and sends condolences to Sudesna, Sarban, and Danny.
It would be nice if his friends and admirers would send me an email, and I will add their name and other words to a tribute page - GM
|29/4/03 The GM has been groping through boxes of historical HHHH documents and discovered a set of rules for hashing formulated by Rob Elvery and helpers in 1986/7. Most, even for the degenerate bunch who populate the event these days, are relevant, educative, and perceptive. But missing is one of the most important: 28. The GM (in modern nomenclature) is always right!|
|3/5/03 Rotter, Does the 'pubic circle' refer to a circle formed by people approaching puberty or, more likely, does it have anything to do with the pubic hare (on the toilet bowl of life)? Keeled|
|29/4/03 Celebrate May Day in style! First head off here to placate Towed Under, munch Durga's exquisite snackettes, and buy Roger Palmer's used knitted beard-hair hashing socks for almost nothing. Then cap it off with a visit here, where Towed Under will ease the tension after a hard TBS 'do' by throwing beer at the GM (in mistake for her husband), Roger will demonstrate his latest Hash Hose, and Durga will bring round 500mg Flagyl petites.|
|29/4/03 Rotter, A few
weeks ago Towed accused me of being numerically
However, as the auther of the 1272 Trash he now deserves the same title; "some 51 runners gathered.... a further dozen or so late commers.... making the pack up to a total of 57". 51 plus 12 with my maths is 63 and, even allowing for the adjective "some" before 51, the original number of runners would have to be reduced to 45 to give an overall total of 57.
Perhaps he does not know what a dozen is (or maybe Towed Under does all the accounts and kids maths homework at Towed Hall). Regards, Turd
|29/4/03 OK GM, two things.
No. 1: 51 plus a dozen does not make 57. I give you the most simple of tasks to fill in the blank numbers and you cock it up completely.
No. 2: We were not having our party in a pubic circle. I do not, in fact, know what a pubic circle is but I'm damn sure I've never been in the centre of one. Nor do I want any offers of expalnation from the likes of Keeled and the Turd.
|29/4/03 Towed, the numbers reflect what I had counted in the Hash Sheet before and after the Run, or whatever we did in between my additions. It is the 'dozen' which is incorrect. As for 'pubic' - I find it unexpalnable. Rotter|
|GM Sahib, I would like
to get the following closely related points off my chest:
1). It was comforting to read the typical New Yorkerly reserved understatement in Zep's riposte to the hash stats. Up yours too!
2). Also, we must all welcome US moves to restore a Hashemite monarchy in Iraq with the exiled Sharif Ali ibn Alhussein as the new King. This would be a great step forwards for hashing worldwide and would considerably raise our profile in international affairs.
3). I despair at the abilities of any Hashemite to spell anything to do with potatoes correctly. Trash 1269 said: "a bevy of local beauties crossing the bunds between rows of pratai (the Irish for potatoes, not tattie or taty) ...". Any prat would know that the Irish for potato is 'praities', not praitais. Other Irish terms for potato include 'Irish apple' and 'Irish apricot'. By the way I have been reliably informed that the German for potatoes is 'kartoffeln'.
4). Where's the photo of the bevy of local beauties in the latest trash? Keeled
11/4/03 Dear GM, Due to the good experience in the last hash we should perform down downs only with water. Obviously that would be a real punishment for the sinners. And there would be always enough beer left for social drinking. OnOn. Bendy Toes
Bendy, In some ways I agree - it would reduce the stink of stale beer after the hash if I arrived home with a t-shirt soaked with water and not the beer that Handphun and others have being throwing/flobbing at me these days. But mean sods like Keeled Over would stop attending, as they would not be able to get a decent drink at the hash for less than Rs 250. GM
|11/4/03 Rotter, I wish
to lodge a complaint with you about the censoring of my hash photograh in
last week's trash.
Changing my second name from Trotter
to Rotter was bad enough but to claim
that Rotter is also Big
is pure propaganda. Was this the GM's
attempt to shock and awe? You obviously have a short memory as we have all
seen you in your overstated Superman
Thanks for making the hash so enjoyable over the last year. Best regards, Bog Trotter
|8/4/03 Dear GM, Just a
couple of points on this week's trash
- firstly, as far as I recall, I did not interrupt the run discussion but
was invited to take over the circle by your good self and secondly, Turd
Herder seems to have entirely missed the point in his reference to
ball-less dogs. The reference should have been to a case of serious gender
insensitivity by Hayden in having poor
Jathra "fixed", for which I
considered she should be awarded the Hashit.
Just shows we shouldn't allow women on the hash. Towed
PS Won't make the fast hash again this week as Towed Under has told me I have to go out with her.
|3/4/03 Rotter (& Towed),
My apologies for the incorrect mathematics in my earlier "exposition".
(What does expostion mean?). I did not mention that I included the GM
in my calculation and had deducted him from the circle numbers. I forgot
to mention that is in my e-mail as I believed that everyone realised the
GM rarely counts for anything in the
circle. (Thank you for these kind words of support.
It also appears that we started something by having an Irish run as now we are having a German event for 1268. If we follow German tradition everyone will have to drink beer and, therefore, everyone must pay for beer. The down-downs should also be from 1 litre capacity steins.
I have no idea what the Black Forest looks like, therefore, will I miss the run site on Saturday? Do Bog Trotter and I need to wear our leather underpants/knickers for the run? (Bog Trotter could bring her whip if this helps). What is bretzeln? Do I have to buy one? Turd
28/3/03 Dear David, (who?- GM) Namaste How you doing? I'm gonna finish my University in June this year.Thinking to go back Nepal in Dec. Have you any plan to come in UK this year? How is Durga didi, Simon & Bunu? Convey my love for them. I regular look in hash web, and feel I'm really missing all of you, mainly my darling Merina (she's got a great new boyfriend, I'm seeing her most weekends - GM)). How is the effact of war in Nepal? Hope this time Maoist will come in control and join Hash. Hahaha....
Convey my warm regard's to your Hash family in Ktm.Keep in touch, take care, God bless.ON-ON
With love, Subash aka Road Runner
28/3/03 it's more like 53 or 54. get it right potter. zep
- or 49 GM
28/3/03 Please ignore my last email about the Run tomorrow as I've just noticed from the date on the webshite that it was yesterday. Towed
28/3/03 Thanks Towed - where's the trash then? GM
|28/2/03 Dear Sigi realise that, for
the cost of this expedition he could Hash free for over 6 years? For the
sake of 19 days of pain, made worse by the fact that Grumblewald
may actually be going, he could have free beer every Saturday, albeit still
in the company of .
, The recently
circulated invitation to join the Scandinavians on a 19 day trek is of great
concern. Does |
Where do his priorities lie? Also, where is the Hash tomorrow? Towed
|28/3/03 Crafty, I and the pack are feeling that the word 'Sankhu' is not enough to describe the on-site. We desperately need more information (even though Towed has not yet sent me a foul email on the matter). I await expectantly . . . . . OnOn Rotter|
|20/3/03 Rotter, Bog
Trotter and I would like it to be put on record that we had no intention
of commenting on the lack of commentary on the trash for last weeks
hash. However, in order to assist Towed in coming to terms with his persecution
complex, we offer the following comments on the commentary:
18/3/03 Dear GM, In response to anticipated comments from Keeled Over and Turd Herder on the lack of commentary on the run in this week's trash I would like to clarify my position.
The special thing about Run 1266 was that it was the St. Patrick's day run, yet nothing in the run deserved special mention in this context. Neither paper nor grass was green, nor was the paper shamrock-shaped. The weather was not cold, wet and miserable as would have been the case were it held in Ireland on the same day. In general, apart from a bloody great hill, there was little of note in the run itself whereas the circle was all Irish. Potato heads, green everything and the circle run by a little old leprechaun.
I remain respectfully yours, Towed
You creep; I didn't get a jot of respect from you last Saturday. I do however feel that your describing me as a little old leprechaun is probably near the mark. - GM
|10/3/03 Dear GM, Carrotbrain
(Hus Kumar) and I very much enjoyed the hash weekend held in Pokhara from
29 February to 2 March. In spite of the disappointing turnout we still managed
a full programme of hash events. The first day's boating hash involved considerably
less expense than Grumblewald's proposed
dollars rafting trip. Carrotbrain, in
a value-for-money 400 rupees a day rowing boat, was able to row me around
Fewa Tal all day! The second event was a biking hash and yet again we managed
to restrict our expenditure by going for the 60 rupees a day bikes. The
lack of any gears and a comfortable seat did however cause some complaints
from my young companion later on in the evening. The final event was a jog
up Sarangkot on the Sunday morning before a quick dash to the airport and
back to Kathmandu.
We were sorry that so few other Keeledwere able to join us for what turned out to be a very productive weekend. We can only surmise that the poor turnout was due to post-conflict lethargy and the usual confusing map on the website. On-on
|5/3/03 Dear GM, Just wanted to make it clear that the structure in the main photo in the latest trash is not Towed Hall. The real Towed Hall is larger and less airy.Towed|
Hash Weekend coming up at the start of March. Probable venue Riverside Springs Hotel at Kurintaar. More details will gradually seep out.
Grumblewald is interested in including a 5hr rafting trip a $30 a head but I wonder whether we will have time? - GM
As the run on 15th march was originally going to be Bog Trotter's last run (she was scheduled to leave the following weekend), we thought setting a St. Patrick's day run would be a good idea.
However as there is likely to be a war going on about then she will probably delay her departure,so she would really like to set a St. Patrick's day run. She and Beaufort have several good ideas for the run. Therefore on your understanding and graciousness the run directions are below: (Turd Herder)
24/2/03 Well, you know now . . . Some exciting Historical information you need to know about shipping manure: In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship. It was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large shipments of manure were common. It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by-product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM! Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined just what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them which meant for the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production of methane. Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T," which came down through the centuries and is in use to this very day. You probably did not know the true history of this word. Neither did I. via Lao Lover
23/2/03 Dear GM, Believe me the origin of the name is less interesting than the name itself - but surely Honey Bunny should have had the down down for sneaking on a fellow harriette - no doubt you have a look alike . . . . I promise, hash honour, to give him a Himalayan Hash down down when I get back - any suggestions? (Yes - for revealing Private Parts to us - GM)
Thanks to Himalayan H3 for the great hospitality - welcoming me as a returner on my first run and not wishing to recognise me as a leaver . . as they say in Sri Lanka - I'll go and come! OnOn Private Parts
|22/2/03 Dear GM, I am concerned that outsiders who look at our website may get the wrong impression about the HHHH. Anyone browsing through the photos on the latest (and noticably textless) trash (1262) would think that all we do is walk through fields of custard or, if running, dress like fairies and skip about. Lets get back to the true image of hashing. Some idiot goes out and scatters waste paper across the countryside whilst the rest of the pack take a short walk on trails not defiled by such waste and get on with the serious business of drinking. Fortunately the main picture tells a better story. Towed|
22/2/03 Honourable GM, be careful of incognito visitors hiding their true identity. Visitor Lana's correct name is "Private Parts". on-on Honey Bunny, Jacaranda Hash House Harries, Johannesburg
Thanks HB, you sneak, the circle will make enquiries/strip Lana to discover the origin of this name. GM
19/2/03 - Dear GM, I am concerned that outsiders who look at our website may get the wrong impression about the HHHH. Anyone browsing through the photos on recent trashes would think that all we do is stand around and drink beer! Couldn't some running shots be included as well? Keeled
There is a fairly remote chance on an HHHH hash of someone running while another is in roughly the same place at the same time holding a camera correctly but not running. But you are lucky - there was a suitable combination of circumstances on Hash 1262. See the trash which had now been posted - and and contains a very detailed report of the day's proceedings- GM
|16/2/03 - Hi David, The hares decided to roll off hash 1263 from 1st Bungamati Tree! I admit the location is not very creative, however, the area is well-known to me. This was decisive since I did not agree to the other hare's procedure, namely to spend an entire day reckoning the area. Haring should be spontaneous. Could you please take the paper to your office. I am off to site tomorrow, however, I will send somebody to pick it up from your office. on-on 69|
13/2/03 - Dear Rotter, I am concerned that the disturbing image at the top of the latest Trash could lose the HHHH website its ranking as a site suitable for children. My three year old burst into tears and has been having bad dreams since he accidently came across it whilst browsing the web. On-on, Keeled
Sorry about this KO. An horrific mistake (although I'd like to see the photo he was taking). So I have replaced it with the usual gathering shot. GM
|13/2/03 - I am able to
answer the question attached to the third small photo in Trash 1261.
For your information, the object attached to Hillary's left arm is, in fact, an anti-wanking device that had to be forcibly applied to preserve her eyesight. Towed
|12/2/03 Turd Herder has pointed out that there was some sort of agreement to wear red at Hash 1262 in honour of St. Valentines day. Quite why this came about I don't know - perhaps an ordinary hashing session is getting too boring for those that need special kicks. GM|
Extract from the Kathmandu Post of 11th Feb: "The long running saga of management hand-over of the state-owned Rastriya Banijya Bank to a private party formally completed . . . . Similarly other two appointees are British nationals Charles Sterling and Run Crafty, a Canadian, [sic!!] to the post of Chief Treasury and Information Technology Manager respectively."
Come to Hash 1262 and help find out why Sideways is masquerading under another hash name! And about a British banker called Sterling - GM