Trashing the Valley since 1979
HIMALAYAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS
Grand Master: David Potter - tel: 570809 -e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org
Himalayan Mixed Hash Run No.1181
8 September 01
Hares: Lao Lovers and mutt Baloo Location: Gokarna Park Entrance
Despite the deteriorating weather, the hash hard core turned up early, probably because the potholes through Bauddha and Jorpati have been mostly repaired. The GM, with his usual wisdom and glee, waited till it started raining before calling all 27 talkative runners into a circle - so talkative they had to be called twice. The hares were asked to explain the run and were promptly called to order by the GM for deviation. So, they admitted to 7 checks with 2 and 5 holding, false trails marked with crosses and a sensible (hmm . . . I seem to remember you using the word "short" - GM) length run.
The pack took off across the main road with complete disregard for the traffic. All survived to find the first paper behind the temple. On the way to the first check near the top of the first hill, a dog-fight was observed as Baloo was taken on by a pint sized local hound - more about this later. Paper was found by The Jedi heading up the ridge, but Krishna carried on up through the rubbish dump to get to holding check 2 first. Two false trails led off from the check, both were found but the real trail to the left was found at the same time by The Jedi again. Check 3 was a bit obscure and the front runners ran past it but Mad Cow showing unusual wisdom and remembering the route the hares used last time in the same area, quickly found the back check and led off to check 4, back on the local main road. The false trail from here was found quickly, and then the hounds found themselves another false trail, completely unmarked by paper. No point asking why; the hounds probably don't know and will have forgotten by now. Holding check 5 was eventually found on the ridge under a big tree and the front runners waited patiently until Rodent showed up carrying daughter Maya as penance for going on the hash. It was the GM, who claims he's never been in the area, who found paper heading along the ridge to the southwest. Check 6 was the last point on the ridge, the trail dropping down into the valley for a nice run through undisturbed country with no sign of habitation. No one found the false trail off check 7 and all hounds headed right back towards the chariots and beer.
The hares were awarded the magnificent score of 9.6 out of His Cow's hat for a good run with no untoward incidents, apart from the dog-fight.
Two virgins graced the run, the male one, probably called Clive, having much difficulty in restraining himself from drinking before the song reached "drink it down…". What else can you expect from an Aussie? However, surprisingly, he couldn't drink it all down at once and needed two goes at it. Probably just after a free beer. Returnees Pinchi, Premila, and Anuja were welcomed back, followed by Rodent complete with daughter still on shoulders - a long penance this one. Dog-handler Kate took a down-down on behalf of Baloo for being a bully and attacking a much smaller dog, causing mayhem on the first leg of the run. Baloo claims that the rat-size dog actually attacked her first so the punishment was probably a miscarriage of canine justice.
Spare Part, having behaved himself for a change and even arriving early without splashing anyone, was awarded the Hashit for not doing anything wrong.
69 managed to disrupt the smooth and highly organised proceedings of the circle by allowing his cell phone to ring. For this reprehensible behaviour, he was forced to use his cell phone to call missing hashers, in particular Wendy, to ask why they weren't at the hash and what they were doing. Wendy's response that she was relaxing was most definitely an offence and will be dealt with at the proper time, i.e. when she next appears on the hash. 69 was awarded with a down-down.
Mark claimed that he was a visiting hasher from the White House Hash, which is as doubtful as the IMF's usual prescriptions for poor countries. It is suspected that he was here to examine why the hash continues to make a profit despite, or perhaps because of, the absence of Stats. I am sure that the GM will claim that it is nothing to do with the recent absence of mo-mos.
The circle was brought to a conclusion in a bit of a hurry in order for a good many to make the change of body fluids, clothes, and social graces, necessary for attendance at the British Gurkha Ball taking place later at "Finger's Folly", just up the road.