Trash 1326 - The Towed Complaint Update
The vagaries of RNAC led to an under strength Delhi Capital Hash (CH3) joining the one thousand three hundred and twenty-sixth running of the Himalayan Mixed Hash. The CH3 were under strength in more ways than one as, not only had a few of their team failed to get plane tickets, but some of them had only landed in Kathmandu at 3am, just 12 hours before the start.
The run, starting from Leyla "Ever Ready" Tegmo's "rather opulent looking large yellow house", was a masterpiece of mismanagement set by the grandmasters of the Delhi and Kathmandu hashes. The initial paper led off to the south towards the Ring Road. Confusion and chaos soon set in as a strange CH3-style single-circle-check saw the pack scatter around a network of back alleys and narrow roads searching for paper. The revving engines of Tata trucks drowned out the shouts of "lost paper" and "on-on" and soon the runners had split into two groups.
One group, misled by Jerry "Towed" Burton - whose aversion to paper seems to worsen every week, left paper and headed south towards Rotter's Roost expecting a mid-run beer stop there. The Towed followers were Peter "Fast Forward" Reitveld", Bill "The Fox" Robbins, and Ian "Tadpole" Burton. Meanwhile the main pack fought its way across the Ring Road, skirted Kusunti and jogged eastwards parallel with the Ring Road through Tikhidol and Talchhikhel to the Khumaltar Agricultural Research Farm. From there the running was very pleasant and the pack continued along trails behind the Satdobato swimming pool. By this time the runner's hare, CH3 GM Deputy Dawg, had gone AWOL and the pack were a little disconcerted at the outwards trails being marked by paper that was only about five metres from checks. Was this another example of perverted CH3 hash protocol?
Torsten "Rodent" Berg voiced the suspicion that something was up, but Steve "Keeled Over" Keeling insisted on pressing on and followed paper along an unmade road to where it veered off northeast by a small temple and into an area of open land by the Kodku Khola. All became clear as David "Rotter" Potter, standing on-high at the mid-point holding check shouted: "you plonkers are going the wrong way round!" Heedless, the runners continued in the wrong direction heading back into Lagankhel through the Ashok Stupa and on home with Rodent and John "Grumblewald" Grunwald leading the way.
As with the run, the circle was quite a chaotic affair with the GM waving his hands around and shouting a lot. My memory of the circle is somewhat clouded, partly due to the consequences of Leyla's post-hash party. I do recall that Every Ready got several down-downs, most of which she poured over her head; that Towed's piles were iced; that the visiting Vicar sang a ditty about onanism (look it up in the dictionary stupid - it's got nothing to do with on-oning); and that the Hashit went to the hares for gross paper mismanagement.
Thanks to Durga "Mrs Rotter" Potter for the snacks and to Every Ready for the post-hash party and all the fantastic nosh and booze.