|Himalayan Mixed Hash Run No. 1553||9 August 2008|
|Location||Way out East from Bal Kumari past Tikathali||Hares||He Bitch, StripTies, Shobha|
|Hashers||37||Hashit||Jason the Benevolent|
|Trash||SuperSuction||Trashflash||Ryan & Miranda|
|Remarkables||virgins: Pascal, Nirjal returnees:Jay, Meghna, Rajesh, Apple, Jo, Yog, Buttercup|
|The Pictures||The Trash|
Nice guy gets the Hashshit
Jugheads - thanks to Itchyballs
The Olymp(r)ic(k) Hash
Set by those perennial bronze medallists He Bitch and Striptease. The run and walk nearly got off to a bad start...actually it did get off to a bad start.
Firstly in terms of the on-in...the instructions on how to get there really required you to be travelling to the hash with Sherlock Holmes in the car...to help you piece together the clues to the secret location (under a broken bridge...which one?, near the ring road...no, through the longest village in the valley...yes). The mystery here deepens as the original instructions have now been replaced on the website by new ones...that almost make sense...but this must have been done after the event(?) Well it can't have been the hares they definitely have an alibi (they were both committed to a lunatic asylum by the mis-management shortly after the run). Anyway most seemed to make it there in the end, to the spacious parking lot set above the river on the road to nowhere! Even Shoba got there...but then she had a good motivation, having been badly misled by Butt on the way, she had murder on her mind...maybe she'll get lucky next week Butt.
Secondly, the "harebrains" turned up late...very late. Apparently they'd laid 60% of the run and then realised they were in Bhaktapur and it was five to three...Ke garne. So to the run...after a small circle where the new lords of the rings explained the strange markings we were to follow we were off...almost. Over the bridge, through the village, round a field and straight back to the on-in. Oops as Striptease explained we'd turned the wrong way at the start and had just run part of the last loop ! Doggy Style was ready to hand out a gold medal there and then (to the calls of "social drinking") for the shortest ever Himalayan Hash. We should have realised then that it could only get worse...and it did. By this time your scribe was not in the best of moods, having won his own Olymp(r)ic(k) gold for diving. A triple somersault off a small pebble onto the tarmac, landing perfectly on an already badly sprained wrist...what a tit.
So we made a second attempt to get off and this time turned the wrong way following the trail that had been laid. We wound our way through the fields towards the first and second checks. More trouble was on the horizon as the local bees (yes bees!) took exception to our presence on the trail and they started to hand out "medals" of their own to Trouble, Howzdat and He Bitch. Still it provided GMizz an opportunity to lay hands on them as she attempted to heal the offending stings and bites. It was too late for Trouble's ear which had swollen to twice its normal size...but still wasn't working...as he continued to ignore calls of on back as he was seen galloping off up yet another false trail. It was almost too late for He Bitch too. He'd been stung on the head and as GMizz went to squeeze the small red lump that had appeared, it was pointed out that it may be his brain and she could damage him for life if she squeezed it and it burst.
After leaving the first holding, most of the pack was spooked again by the trail apparently leading them back to the spot they'd just left. "We're running in Olymp(r)ic(k) circles" someone was heard to call. Undeterred we foolishly (as it happens) continued to place our faith in the hare(s) abilities to see us home. Off through a field they took us heading towards the third check. At this stage we couldn't see the Scholars due to the height of the grass and greenery, which was a shame...as they were out in front and seemed to know where they were going. At one point they called "on on" and the pack was seen frantically looking for a rustle and movement in the undergrowth to see where they'd gone! Still we made it to the second holding and thought we'd made it through the worst.
Nope...after reaching check five and an impromptu water stop we were advised that the on-in was just twenty minutes down road. The pack split in two, group one went with Striptease (not this scribe, as I happened to remember him getting lost at the start) and another group tagged along with He Bitch, the sensible option we thought...Forty minutes later we stopped running and were told by a local we were now 30 minutes away (in completely the wrong direction) from the bridge we were looking for! So it was an about turn and off we went back the way we'd come, with the said He Bitch alternately looking bemused and completely shameless (so about normal for him) about his part in the developing shambles.
The walk led by Shoba (the hares had no hand in this) was a lovely affair by all accounts. Lots of sights to be seen, the usual mix of chat and gossip and a river crossing! This involved the careful removal of shoes and socks and foot drying on the other side (rumour has it some had brought towels for this purpose). This just ain't hashin!
Great circle at the end with awards a plenty
The most hairbrained hares He Bitch and Striptease of course with a run score of 00000...harsh...but fair.
Virgins, Pascal (mines a G&T, ice and a slice please) and Nirjal
Returnees, almost too many to mention Jo, Yogi (under protest), Rajesh, Apple and Jay and Meghna
Butt for mis-directing Shoba into the wilds in the hope of getting her behind a bush (or some such nonsense)
Lots of hash crashes Supersuction, Spiderwoman and Pascal
Rabi A for making but NOT selling the Hash 1500 DVDs, along with Striptease and He Bitch (again) for the on-going and probably never ending tee- shirt fiasco
He Bitch (again, again) and Puja for new shoes
Impressive for loitering with intent at the back of the circle eyeing asses
And of course HariKrishna for his three hundredth run (!) not one of which he has run its entirety we are told.
Then DoggyStyle and Ram for setting last week's Hash on motorbike, now that the GMizz had remembered
The hashit this week was awarded to Jason – for being helpful, well that'll teach him then!
And then there was a hat ceremony, presided over by Apple and well attended by GMizz and KO.
So next week's run, Yogi's setting so bring good running shoes, a torch and a sleeping bag!
etting so bring good running shoes, a torch and a sleeping bag!