Himalayan Mixed Hash Run No. 1569 29 September 2008
Location just to the west of the University, Kirtipur Hares Kruel and DoggyStyle
Hashers 60, of whom 12 paid for beer Hashit Kruel
Trash Hebitch and SuperSuction Trashflash Rotter, Alex
Remarkables virgins: Alice and Tony Kwok, MartaGuglielmette, Linden Mallory, Elizabeth Embickreturnees: Helena, Liv Torheim, Philip Sedlak, Abigail leavers: Turd Herder, Alice and Tony Kwok
The Pictures The Trash

The river gorge between Kirtipur and Naikap

Hash Fly-past below Naikap. Warning: 3Mb file.

Virgins Elizabeth and Linden

Returnees Philip and Liv

KO forces a down-down on Chris for not keeping up at the back while dad presses on at the front

Hashit for Kruel and son

The Loneliness of a "Long Distance" Hasher

Well, as one of the co-scribes for this week's adventure, I know I can start this episode of the trash without fear of comment or contradiction, primarily because as I know for a fact, my partner in crime on this particular literary recollection of the days events, HeBitch, was one of the many late arrivals who, in common with many of the Hashers and Harriets currently attending the HHHH, is obviously not in possession of a working time piece that would let them know when 2pm on a Saturday beckons. (Hey KO, I've had a go at punctuating that last sentence. Can you make it read any better? (and I don't mean by deleting it all) GM) Our esteemed GM, who is not so afflicted, and who we are reliably informed always "comes on time" is currently struggling to devise a suitable penalty for the tardy... suggestions I'm sure would be gratefully received. (particularly if they were to have a postive effect on My Pension Fund - GM)

So there I was, moving from one foot to the other while guessing how many minutes I would need to transport myself to Kirtipur. The lady had promised it would be ‘only 5 minutes’ but if my mathematic skills had not deserted me by now, she was folding momo number 37 out of the 80 I ordered. My only relief was to realize how understanding my fellow hashers would be if they saw I was late because of wanting to bring them snacks, (KO, I'd go for a semi-colon at this point. What thinks you? - GM) surely they would wait for me.
 
So having finally assembled (who had assembled, the circle or me? - GM), the GM proceeded to ensure that we had a fully gender disaggregated circle, girls on one side boys on the other (I thought we were about to start an eightsome reel) and introduced our Hares for the day, Kruel and Doggy Style. They provided a curiously short briefing for what in fact turned out to be a bit of a monster of a trail.  Twelve checks we were told, with numerous holdings and no hills, standard stuff so far... we should have guessed that something was up when Kruel, not one to sniff at a long run left the briefing to Doggy, exiting the circle stage left in an embarrassed looking fashion - he obviously knew what we were in for!

So off we set due west at a fair old trot gradually assembling at check #1, where our intrepid co-scribe joined the proceedings... now how did he get there?

Damn! The university area turned out a bit bigger than expected, luckily all the drivers that stay behind know the drill by now. While Prem was catching my bag, helmet and jacket, I got briefed about directions and minutes between me and the pack. Already after ten minutes, I detected the steady movement of Lao Lover. Hare Doggystyle was waiting to point us towards the first check.
 
On-on west heading towards Pokhara, with another gorge scrambling extravaganza between checks two and three, and then off to Kalanki, Doggy living up to his name as he got up close and personal with Sundari ensuring that at least he got across the main drag safely.

Dear fellow scribe, do not forget Hurry Krishna and his inner compass. He was the first one who detected the hare’s tactic to guide us from hill to hill. He managed to flawlessly point out the hill where the pack would regroup.  

By now we were approaching check #6. The half way point? ...not on your Nelly (Who she? She didn't pay. GM), we were still heading out of town!  Much to Howzatts disgust. Still we reached the statue above Kalanki unscathed and had to rely on the GM to find the correct trail downhill (as recorded in the headline photo - GM) with Half-a-Lunch complaining that he needed a second or third wind to reach the end.

Other hashers were also starting to feel the torture of the hares. The FRB’s started to loose (sic) their focus, with Dingaling as an example, making us look in all other directions for paper while he was unconsciously standing on the first blob.
 
The home arrow was nowhere in sight as we wound our way back over the main drag with Dingaling advising all and sundry that the "white house" was definitely an option for the hard core on the way home. Oh how we laughed...but hey, he wasn't far wrong, as the hare proceeded to wind the trail closer and closer to the southern edge of the valley.

Holding number nine was near a little shop that turned out to possess excellent Chang. This caused Krishna, Trouble and myself to again fall behind. We ended up chasing the pack to check number ten while being chased by locals who were activated by the bottles of local wine we brought along.

By holding-check ten the pack was almost in disarray. Thank heavens for our co-scribe and a couple of bottles of rice wine to fortify the faint of heart and short of legs.

At last we started to head north, and by now it was turning into an every-man-for-himself affair. Keeled elected to abandon his son, and everyone elected to abandon Lao and his Lover as the pack scattered themselves across the valley heading toward Kirtipur.

The picture of being able to have your feet standing next to each other, while eating and drinking did indeed spark a sense of selfishness amongst the hashers. People forgot to inform their fellow runners when they saw paper and scattered out over the university area. Besides those left behind mentioned above, we were left with only a vague recollection of the GM running with us.
 
The final holding was at the main temple in Kirtipur, where Trouble provided solace to sooth the loneliness of the remaining long distance hashers by arranging an impromptu tour of the lower tantric carvings. Each was described (and felt? GM) in intimate detail until Liquor and Krishna, losing interest, suggested we all just bolt for home.

By now, the small group that had managed to get up to the temple realised that the rest of the pack was scattered around well behind. Were was the jolly large group of people we started with? Every now and then, we came across a few remains, stumbling down the hill.
 
Rather than partake of the excellent nibbles provided by the Hares, we of course headed back up the trail to recover the lost and the undecided. The nibbles succeeded in keeping the baying pack under control and, strangely enough, after the dust had settled everyone eventually agreed that the run probably hadn't been long enough!
 
Let's see how
HeBitch copes with a limerick:

There was a young hasher called Doggystyle
Who decided today’s hash should be more than a mile
He didn't care he knew he could hare
And we all would try to keep up with him in despair
We followed his trail and looked for his paper
And rescued
Sundari when dogs saw a babe in her
So we'll call it a day and hope for the best
And think of
KO’s son out there, while we finally rest

On On
SuperSuction/HeBitch

For Kruels Google Earth plot of the route: click here

tml"> For Kruels Google Earth plot of the route: click here